Whatever the weather is doing
You can always find something to do
with things to see and games to play
and I'll play them with you
You don't need money to have fun
If fact you don't even need the sun
But

If it's sunny we can ride our bikes
If it's snowy we'll have a snowball fight
If it's windy let's go fly a kite
We'll weather the weather whatever the weather
and we'll do what we like

Don't be sad if it's raining
When else can you dance in the rain?
And the sky might shine with rainbows
when the sun comes out again
And when it's over we'll put on our boots
and splash in the puddles with hollers and hoots
And

If it's sunny we can ride our bikes
If it's snowy we'll have a snowball fight
If it's windy let's go fly a kite
We'll weather the weather whatever the weather
and we'll do what we like

If it gets so cold you want to hide
I guess we'll just have to stay inside

We'll stay in at minus forty
that's what houses are for
We'll draw and paint and sing some songs
And play board games on the floor
It'll warm up, then warm up some more
And we'll grab our coats and out the door
But

If it's sunny we can ride our bikes
If it's snowy we'll have a snowball fight
If it's windy let's go fly a kite
We'll weather the weather whatever the weather
and we'll do what we like

We'll weather the weather whatever the weather
and we'll do what we like

Sometimes I get so sick I can't get out of bed
but then I stop being sick and be awesome instead
'Cause that's what Neil Patrick Harris would do
Mr. Patrick Harris I'm so in love with you

Come with me, we'll sail the stars and fly to Venus
Dude, check that out, it's awesome! I mean really have you seen this?
Why don't you love me? I think it's because of your meanness
or possibly it's because I don't have a penis

Sometimes I'm so in love I start to look like Ted
but then I stop being in love and be awesome instead
'Cause that's what Neil Patrick Harris would do
Mr. Patrick Harris I'm so in love with you

There's this guy on Harold and Kumar who looks just like Neil
But I don't think it's him, he does lots of drugs and he likes to steal
and more importantly he likes pussy
but then again he's kind of awesome so it could be real

Sometimes I'm so confused I have to scratch my head
but then I stop being confused and be awesome instead
'Cause that's what Neil Patrick Harris would do
Mr. Patrick Harris I'm so in love with you

Neil Patrick Harris got his PHD when he was like three. True story
And then he spent some time being super smart doing surgery
and then he took his clothes off on stage and it was artistic
Then he banged lots of chicks when changed his name to Barney

Then he was a supervillain
Then he was a supervillain
Then he was a supervillain

Sometimes I'm so jealous I have to hang my head
but then I stop being jealous and be awesome instead
'Cause that's what Neil Patrick Harris would do
Mr. Patrick Harris I'm so in love with you

What would Neil Patrick Harris do?
What would Neil Patrick Harris do?
WWNPHD? WWNPHD? WWNPHD? WWNPHD?
He'd be awesome

That's what Neil Patrick Harris would do
Mr. Patrick Harris I'm so in love with you

You need to stop taking the world on your shoulders
and you need to make your own warmth when it's colder outside
You need to take breaks when you've worked for hours and hours
You need to take time to enjoy life and smell the flowers
'Cause there's so much to enjoy
and so much that's in your own power

Hey Kaitlyn, how are you today?
Did you sleep last night, or did you worry yourself into the shakes?
Hey Kaitlyn, is it one of those good days
when anything is possible and no one is as awesome as you?

You need to know you don't have to control it all
You need to make yourself vulnerable and small sometimes
You need to give things to somebody else to make
You need to know that it's ok to make mistakes
'Cause you're so capable
but sometimes all give and no take

Hey Kaitlyn, how are you today?
Did you sleep last night, or did you worry yourself into the shakes?
Hey Kaitlyn, is it one of those good days
when anything is possible and no one is as awesome as you?
Kaitlyn did you sleep last night?

You need to stop taking the world on your shoulders and
You need to make your own sunshine when you go inside

Hey Kaitlyn, how are you today?
Did you sleep last night, or did you worry yourself into the shakes?
Hey Kaitlyn, is it one of those good days
when anything is possible and no one is as awesome as you?
Hey Kaitlyn, enjoy yourself today
Get some sleep tonight, and remember, you can always take a break
Hey Kaitlyn, make it one of those good days,
'cause anything is possible and no one is as awesome as you
Hey Kaitlyn, how are you today?
Did you sleep last night?
Kaitlyn did you sleep last night?

I'm gonna go to the grocery store
I like shopping by myself
I can choose what I want, I can come back for more
I can stand on my toes and reach the top top shelf

You know I'll be gone for hours
I might get cookies or some flowers

This is where I have control
The grocery store, I'm on a roll
Financial choices, I don't have to phone
I like doing the grocery shopping alone

I know where I'll be next Sunday at noon
the grocery store in the baking aisle
and the Sunday after that and the next one too
'Cause strict routine just makes me smile

So don't ask me to Sunday brunch
'cause there's something else I like a bunch

This is where I have control
The grocery store, I'm on a roll
My other plans I'll just postpone
I like doing the grocery shopping alone

Why can't you understand
I take my time, I check out every little thing
Got my shopping list in one hand
I cross out everything as I go and add up all the prices

One thing's for sure, I just like you a lot
There's no one else I could stand to live with
I like coming home to show you what I bought
and treats for you like gross pickle chips

You and me are reason and rhyme
But reason sometimes likes alone time

I'm fussy about details
But our love it still prevails
You're best I've ever known but
I still like doing the grocery shopping alone

It wasn't very long ago,
I got myself a girl.
Then she called me every night,
She said I was her world.
A friend said, "How's your girlfriend?
Should we throw a celebration?"
I said, "We haven't had the
Girlfriend status conversation"

Chorus:
Psycho girlfriend followed me home
Psycho girlfriend listened on my phone
Psycho girlfriend still has my key
Psycho girlfriend, why do you love me?

She came around my house at night,
When everything was still.
Before she walked away she left me
Presents on my windowsill.
Three days is not enough for me,
So I put it to an end.
But now she's pissed and now I see,
I've got a psycho girlfriend.

Chorus

She's sure not a time waster,
Carries around a turkey baster.
I thought it was just a f*ck,
But she hired a U-Haul truck.

Chorus

She said that she would die,
If I didn't phone.
But I just want to know,
What's she doing in my home?
But her life is on my conscience,
And she's telling all her friends
That I'm using her and she'd be lost
If this ever ends.

Chorus

All her stuff is in my house,
I've got to burn and purge.
Before you get a girl beware
The psycho urge to merge.

I like the one where I rescue a princess
'Cause I'm large and masculine, and ...kinda dirty
'Cause I keep going down holes, and I can shoot fireballs out of my hand
and I go to a castle where I jump on a monster, yeah.

What do you think? My place or yours?
If I go home alone I'll end up doing chores
So take my hand, tell me your name, let me come over and play video games
All night long

I like the one where I have my own little fairy
and I rescue a princess, (man, I sure like those princesses)
and I have a big long sword, and I can shoot white stuff out of my sword,
and I go to the deep dark dungeons where it's kinda scary, yeah.

What do you think? My place or yours?
If I go home alone I'll just do chores
So take my hand, tell me your name, let me come over and play video games
All night long

I like the one where I'm a big, strong, manly bounty hunter
But I'm soft and feminine on the inside
and my worst enemies can suck my life-force out of my brain
and I go around fighting pirates in my spaceship, yeah.

So what do you think? My place or yours?
If I go home alone I'll just end up doing chores
So take my hand, tell me your name, let me come over and play video games
All night long

What do you think? My place or yours?
If I go home alone be really, really bored
So take my hand, tell me your name, let me come over and play video games
All night long

You may believe a savior saved your soul
You may believe he hasn't come yet (He or she, I mean)
You may believe there's a god looking out for you
Or one that doesn't care or none at all, but don't forget

Winter's a good time to hang out with your friends
Or your family, if you've got 'em, and eat good food
Warm up by the fire, give tokens of your love
Store bought or home made, but don't just sit there and brood

Chorus:
Happy yuletide, Happy post-winter solstice
Happy December and new year's
To everyone I know, no matter where you go or what you do
A very merry nondenominational holiday to you

You may believe it's all too commercial
"They've taken Christ right out of Christmas"
You may believe they hijacked pagan ritual ("One god, my ass")
You may just laugh and call it giftmas

But winter's a good time to hang out with your friends
Or your family, if you've got 'em, and eat turkey, or tofurkey
Warm up by the fire, give tokens of your love
So try and be happy and perky

Chorus

Whether we believe it's all fun and games
or a chance for piousness and love to blossom
I'm sure we're all agreed the day off from work
or double normal wage is truly awesome

Chorus

So don't complain so much
Happy holidays to you

Me and my guy have different taste.
He likes red hair and a skinny waist.
For me the goth look doesn't disappoint.
We have this game where we try to spot
all the people we think are hot
and when we do we always get a point.

A skinny guy in a band t-shirt -
I say "point."
There's a girl in a really short skirt -
He says "point."
A short haired tomboy - we both say "point."
It's nice when we agree so easily.

Chorus:
It isn't hard to find
a cutie if it's on your mind.
Do it with your partner
whatever the weather.
It makes us blush
when we get a new crush.
I know we'll keep looking,
looking forever.
The point game always
brings people together.

We add up our points. If I'm the winner
then he has to buy me dinner.
We whisper and giggle and walk hand in hand.
You should try it. Find some hotties,
cute faces and sexy bodies.
See if you find more than your partner can.

A piercing enthusiast with spiky hair -
I say "point."
A girl with visible underwear -
He says "point."
A punk rock couple - we both say "point."
There's one for you and one for me.

Chorus

Me and my guy have different taste.
He likes red hair and a skinny waist.
I like guys but he's not into that.
But there are times once in a blue moon
when the person that will make me swoon
and the one he likes will completely match.

Chorus
The point game always brings us together.

I go to check my mail,
Your name is on my screen.
You ask about my day
So casually. Like
Nothing else has changed.
What's with this crap that's on my screen?
Don't care about your f*cking day.
Makes me wanna scream ‘cause

Chorus:
I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
So glad that I don't see you now.
I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
Stop messaging me.

And as if to make things worse,
You call me pet names like
Your hunny.
Like you don't even care whether
I even like that sh*t.
Will this go on forever?
I didn't even like those pet names
When we were together.

Chorus

And if you see me on the street,
Do me this one favour please;
Pretend like you don't know me.
Just walk away.
And if I see you in the park,
Even if it's late and dark,
I'll do my very best not to
Smash your face in.

I go to check my mail,
Your name is on my screen.
Your user icon
Shows you by yourself.
And it makes me kind of happy.
Think it's good for my health,
To see you left unwanted
On the shelf.

I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
So glad that I don't see you now.
I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
Did you know you're a lying cow?
When you became a cheating whore,
I got out the best way I knew how.
I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
Stop messaging me.
Stop messaging me.
Stop messaging me.
Stop messaging me.
So please stop messaging me.

You were a friend, I gave you my trust
I never suspected that you might be slime
You did something you knew would disgust me
and then you lied for three months at a time

Chorus:
You're a liar and I hope something
really bad happens to you

You heard me right, I want you to suffer
like a McDonald's employee
Maybe if your time is taken up by stress
you won't have time to annoy me

Chorus

I hope you wake up at four AM
every night for the rest of your life
I hope you only find ten thousand spoons
when all you need is a knife

Chorus

Not something tragic like your horrible flaming death
Just something really really annoying
Something that makes you seethe with every breath
That would be really worth enjoying

Chorus

I hope you get an inexplicable rash
from something in your home you can't get rid of
I hope you have lots of stupid fights
every time you think you're in love

I hope you end up living with your folks
and listen to them nag about chores and money
I don't want something tragic like you losing all your limbs
but hopefully something just as funny

Chorus x2

This is the story of a girl
who finds pleasure in the world
Sometimes she forgets
to notice the little things
but mostly everything's ok
Especially on a day like today

She stands on a bus that has three seat rows
picking off petals: a three leaf rose
Sipping, and tapping, her tea, her toes
They're painted in pink and cyan
She wrings her hands

"He loves me, he loves me..." She never says 'not'
Her toenails show in the sandals she bought
The bus is so crowded, the temperature hot
Her tea gets less so as she stands
It warms her hands

He's there at the bus stop, he looks at the floor
A flurry of motion and she's out the door
He looks up, he looks in her eyes, il adore
He drops everything, smiles "Hey man"
He moves to stand

Her heart opens up like a fan
She takes his hand

She could be happy just knowing he's around
Sometimes joy is hard to lose once it's found
She counts the ways he loves her and forgets the 'loves me not'
She could find happines in everything she's got

The petals of a rose, the polish on her toes
The smile of a boy who loves everything he knows about her
Everything he knows about her

There's lots of kinds of people in this world
and I'm, well, I'm not like other girls
How do I explain this properly?
My boyfriend's girlfriend isn't me

Well obviously one of them is
But there's another girl of his
And I know her and she knows me
and that would be great if it was just us three

But she has a guy who's even more pretty
and a long-distance thing in another city
He and his wife come by when they can
and they have a kid who calls me his aunt

Just when I thought it was all too crazy
I tried to draw our family tree
There's nothing wrong with extra love
But the paper wasn't big enough

Chorus:
Of all the ways I've ever dated
it's never been so complicated
The chain can extend to eternity
'cause my boyfriend's girlfriend isn't me

We spent Christmas eve with my boyfriend's dad
Christmas day with my folks and the feast they had
New Years, he went to his girlfriend's city
I mean the one who isn't me

She brought him and her other guy
to her company picnic and I won't lie
I wasn't used to being alone
so I want someone new of my own

It isn't easy to find a fling
'Cause when you hit on some tasty thing
They say "Aren't you with that guy?"
You say "Oh he doesn't mind.

Have you ever seen 'Big Love'?
Know what I mean, wink, wink, nudge, nudge..."
And they say "Oh, so you're a Mormon?"
"No! ...I'll explain from the beginning..."

Chorus

When the partners get together,
the primaries and all the others,
we give the newbies a little primer
and we all get out our day timers

Calendars as far as the eye can see.
"When can I see you?" "When are you free?"
"Who gets me on my birthday?" and then
"Does anyone have an extra pen?"

The kids have the best celebration.
Gifts from three dozen odd relations.
There's Uncle Jackie's girlfriend, Mary,
Ed who is her secondary...

Ed's new boyfriend brought along
his ex, whose fling is going strong
with someone that I used to know
and just became my boyfriend's beau...

Chorus

A couch where four can snuggle up
Suddenly isn't big enough
And even so we don't give up.
There's no such thing as too much love.

I said people suck and you agreed
You didn't think to say "hey, are you talking 'bout me?"
I should have known it would end like this
Every job you've ever had you up and quit
The boss was mean or the hours were long
How cruel of me to make you sing your own damn songs
and find you opportunities to sing on stage
Where do you find musicians who act their age?
Hypocrites and drug addicts, I don't give a f*ck
In fact I'm glad you're leaving because you suck

I don't need a band and I don't need you
You're dumb, and you smell like poo
You can't play with my guitar anymore
I could be a rock star if it weren't for
the fact that other rock stars suck

I said people suck and I meant it too
The top of the list is drummers like you
"Yeah, I'll join your band, it's rad and unique
Yeah, I'll join your band for a couple of weeks..."
What does commitment mean to your type?
Two jams a week as long as there's hype?
What does it take to keep your attention?
Screamo and noise? And oh, did I mention
Your attitude stinks. I don't give a f*ck
In fact I'm glad you're leaving because you suck

I don't need a band and I don't need you
You're dumb, and you smell like poo
You can't play with my guitar anymore
I could be a rock star if it weren't for
the fact that other rock stars suck

You can't play in my back yard
My back yard, my back yard
You can't play in my back yard
My back yard's full

I said people suck and you agreed
You didn't think to say hey are you talking 'bout me?
But of course I was, you f*cking quitter
You'll have to excuse me if I sound bitter
A year and half of constant work
gone in a moment, you f*cked up jerk
This isn't a hobby, it's my f*cking career
Now I have work alone and I wanna f*cking cheer
No more compromises, I don't give a f*ck
In fact I'm glad you're leaving because you suck

I don't need a band and I don't need you
You're dumb, and you smell like poo
You can't play with my guitar anymore
I could be a rock star if it weren't for...
I don't need a band and I don't need you
You suck and that's all you do
You can't play with my guitar anymore
I could be a rock star if it weren't for
the fact that other rock stars suck
The fact is other rock stars suck

I'm not greedy
I work hard when you give me things
I don't want cars, I don't want shoes,
I don't want diamond rings
Give me all your extra work
you can go play hooky
ask me nice, treat me right,
and bribe me with a cookie

You could try respect
or shower me with praise
and yes I admit
these tactics could phase me
While words and money might be
sweet
They're not like chocolate chip
and they're not that good to eat

If you want me on your side
Cookies are my favourite bribe

Some get what they want
with flirting and a kiss
Some are intimidating
Threatening with fists
There are politicians
who can be bribed with votes
And I guess that's fine for some, I mean
whatever floats your boat, but

If you want me on your side
Cookies are my favourite bribe

Plans to arrange, terms to define
Issues to report, ads to design
Meetings to prepare, notes to transcribe
Cookies are my favourite bribe
Cookies are my favourite bribe
If you want me on your side
Cookies are my favourite bribe